dear diary,
i'm not much of a shy person or closed up one. But i'm always satisfied of what i have and what happens to me. And i don't know if this satisfaction is good or not. i always say "it's OK" when deep down in me it's not damn OK. when i don't get what i want or i don't like something or someone choose something for me that i don't like or someone let me down in something i was really excited about or even ask me about how he looks etc.. i always answer by saying yeah it's fine it's OK it's good. and those words looks good but they are not they kill me from inside, just to not hurt other people, or make them feel bad, or do big things for me, or also to avoid question that i have no answers for.
i think i really need to start deleting those words from my dictionary and start using "i do want" and "it's not OK" and scream what inside of me.
i'm not much of a shy person or closed up one. But i'm always satisfied of what i have and what happens to me. And i don't know if this satisfaction is good or not. i always say "it's OK" when deep down in me it's not damn OK. when i don't get what i want or i don't like something or someone choose something for me that i don't like or someone let me down in something i was really excited about or even ask me about how he looks etc.. i always answer by saying yeah it's fine it's OK it's good. and those words looks good but they are not they kill me from inside, just to not hurt other people, or make them feel bad, or do big things for me, or also to avoid question that i have no answers for.
i think i really need to start deleting those words from my dictionary and start using "i do want" and "it's not OK" and scream what inside of me.